12.6.7: The Ex-Spouses

 12.6.7: The Ex-Spouses

 Anger, depression, and anxiety are common feelings at divorce. But so is relief. Women are more likely than men to feel that divorce is giving them a “new chance” in life. A few couples manage to remain friends through it all; but they are the exception. The spouse who initiates the divorce usually gets over it sooner (Kelly 1992; Wang and Amato 2000) and remarries sooner (Sweeney 2002). Divorce does not necessarily mean the end of a couple’s relationship. Many divorced couples maintain contact because of their children. For others, the continuities, as sociologists call them, represent lingering attachments (Vaughan 1985; Masheter 1991; author’s file 2005). The former husband may help his former wife paint a room or move furniture; she may invite him over for a meal or to watch television. They might even go to dinner or to see a movie together. Some couples even continue to make love after they divorce (Spielmann et al. 2019).